mercredi 13 mai 2015

5 Reasons Sony Doesn't Need To Remake 'The Craft'

In completely unnecessary remake news, Sony is remaking the 1996 cult-classic "The Craft."

The original movie starred Robin Tunney, Fairuza Balk, Neve Campbell and Rachel True as a group of misfit teens who practice witchcraft for personal gain, before everything ultimately spirals out of control.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, the studio has tapped filmmaker Leigh Janiak to write and direct the film, which really has no reason to be remade for the following reasons:

1. The film was the pinnacle of '90's fashion.

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The clothes are half of the reason to watch the "The Craft" in the first place.

2. It's a perfect primer for the timeless sleepover game Light As Feather, Stiff As A Board.

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What? You never tried it?

3. High school bullies haven't changed in the last 19 years.
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Technology may be different, but being mean is a constant.

4. This:
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5. Fairuza Balk as Nancy.
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Seriously, who are they going to cast in the remake? Selena Gomez?

That's all.

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The 10 Most Dangerous Phrases In A Relationship

dangerous

You're on your best behavior when you first start dating someone: polite to a fault, quick to suggest sharing dessert (later, you enter "order your own!" territory), and really, truly careful about what you say.

Then, somewhere down the line, you get comfortable. A little more loose-lipped. You say things you don't mean.

An apology generally goes a long way, but some things said in the heat of the moment may be irreversibly damaging to your relationship. Below, 10 phrases you should banish from your argument arsenal.

1. Anything that begins with “you always” or “you never.”
There's no hope of having a productive conversation once you or your S.O. makes sweeping accusations against each other, said Virginia Gilbert, licensed marriage and family therapist.

"Uttering these words will immediately put the other person on the defensive. Instead of getting what you want, the two of you will spend the rest of the evening -- or the rest of your relationship -- debating who’s right. Instead, use 'I' statements. For instance, 'I feel that I’m usually the one to say 'I love you' and it would make me feel good if you could say it first sometimes.' Keeping the focus on your needs instead of pointing out your partner’s shortcomings -- as glaring as they may be -- invites an opportunity for positive change."

2. "Why do you want to do that? You never used to like to [fill in the blank]."
Healthy, long-lasting relationships involve two people who are able to grow together. You're different people than the ones you were when you first met, so don't freak out or assume there's some ulterior motive if your partner changes his or her habits.

“You each need room to grow," said relationship author and divorce attorney Christina Pesoli. "Just as you wouldn’t be threatened by him updating his wardrobe or growing a beard, you shouldn’t be threatened when he updates his hobbies, either. Developing a new interest isn’t a threat to your relationship, but your refusal to allow him or her to do so is. If you’re with someone who never tries anything new, your relationship will eventually grow stale. So as long as he’s not talking about learning to cook meth or joining ISIS, try embracing his new hobbies."

3. "You're overreacting!"
Related, equally annoying-as-hell phrases include: "You're being too sensitive." "Don't get so defensive!" "Calm down." Let one of these sentences slip and you'll more than likely find yourself in the proverbial dog house, said William J. Doherty, Ph.D., professor of family social science at the University of Minnesota.

"Saying this is a favorite of men trying to get women to stop being upset," he said. "It's never worked in human history, but why not keep trying? The problem is that when in the midst of being upset, no one thinks their feelings are unjustified, and thus they feel unheard and put down. It would make anyone madder."

4. “Mmmhmm. Mmmhmm. Wait -- what did you say?”
Think you've mastered the art of scrolling through Instagram while pretending to listen to your S.O. talk? Think again.

"Eventually, your partner will conclude that you’re not all that interested in what he has to say -- and it’s hard to argue with that," Pesoli said. "Talking to someone who doesn’t really care about what you’re saying can be hard on the ol’ self esteem -- especially when that someone is your significant other. Being too busy to listen every once in a while is understandable. Being too busy to listen all the time is a relationship killer."

5. "I told you so."
What, you thought we'd get through this list without including this classic example?

"Say 'I told you so' one too many times and pretty soon, resentment sets in," dating expert Marina Sbrochi said. "No one likes to be thought of as dumb. Try empathy instead and see how your relationship grows."

6. “Not tonight (or tomorrow night, or any night), honey."
You and your partner aren't always going to be on the same page when it comes to sex. You each should absolutely feel free to say, "Not really in the mood after that brick-sized carnitas burrito." But you don't want "not tonight, not ever" to become the norm.

"Defaulting to 'not tonight' is a bad habit to form," said Pesoli. "Physical intimacy is what makes your relationship with your significant other different than any of your other relationships; otherwise, the two of you are just roommates who may or may not have kids together. If the fire goes out in the bedroom, there’s no question that your relationship will be in peril. Making a little effort to have sex with your S.O. is almost always a good idea.

7. "What's wrong with you?"
Below-the-belt personal attacks have no place in a healthy, loving relationship. Your goal should be to prop your partner up and be his or her cheerleader in hard times, not to bring them down.

"If you find yourself saying something like 'Are you that stupid?' 'What kind of a parent does that?' or 'You're just like your mother,' you need to cease and desist," said marriage therapist Becky Whetstone.

8. "I don't believe you."
There are bound to be times when you suspect your partner is bending the truth a bit -- or a lot. It's how you relay your skepticism that will move you closer to discovering the whole story.

"Maybe you really do suspect he or she has feelings for someone else, for instance, but there's a better way to go about it than accusing your partner of lying," said Doherty. "Saying 'I don't believe you' is inflammatory and almost always backfires. A better version is this: 'I'm having trouble believing you are telling me the whole story.'"

9. "I want a divorce."
When you threaten to breakup or divorce, you're pulling out the big guns . You may have deep regrets about saying it later, but the damage is done. As idle as the threat may be, the message to your partner is loud and clear: you already have one foot out the door. And who wants to be in a relationship like that?

"Simply put, it's emotional blackmail," said Whetstone. "If what you say has a tone of 'if you don't do this, you'll pay or I'll leave,' it's eventually going to take a toll on your partner."

10. “If you really loved me, you'd..."
Nope. Stop right there. Your partner shouldn't ever feel pressured to do something he or she doesn't want to do to prove his or her love for you.

"There’s nothing like guilt combined with a stealthy ultimatum to drain the love right out of a relationship," said Gilbert. "Instead of trying to manipulate your partner, be transparent about what you want: 'I miss spending time with you and I’d like to have a regular date night' is a direct, non-confrontational approach that’s far more likely to get you the love you want than holding your partner hostage emotionally."

Keep in touch! Check out HuffPost Divorce on Facebook and Twitter. Sign up for our newsletter here.

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These Gorgeous Photos Prove That There Are Far Worse Things Than Rain On Your Wedding Day

Denver couple Michael and Tami Mantia were supposed to have an outdoor wedding on Saturday, but Mother Nature had other plans.

The weather that May morning was beautiful, but by the afternoon, fog started rolling in. Then the rain came. By 8 p.m., it was snowing. The bride and groom had no choice but to move the festivities inside and embrace the change of plans.

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Credit: Daylene Wilson Photographic

"As stressed as I was about the weather, plan B turned out to be better than we could have imagined and we would not change anything about the day!" the bride told The Huffington Post.

The newlyweds and their bridal party made the best of the less-than-optimal conditions and took their photos outside anyway. Photographer Daylene Wilson was behind the lens to capture the love and laughs.

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Credit: Daylene Wilson Photographic

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Credit: Daylene Wilson Photographic

The pair -- who met three years ago on a mountain biking trip -- had their ceremony at the Hyatt Regency Denver and held the reception at Dorchester Social Eatery.

"They both went to huge [lengths] to make sure our night was unforgettable -- even with the weather," Tami said.

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Credit: Daylene Wilson Photographic

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Credit: Daylene Wilson Photographic

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Credit: Daylene Wilson Photographic

"Only in Denver does something like this happen. It's just kind of crazy where you expect sun, but you see snow," Michael told Denver NBC affiliate KUSA.

H/T 9 News/KUSA

Keep in touch! Check out HuffPost Weddings on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest. Sign up for our newsletter here.

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Why 'Philanthropy Needs To Go Where Government Won't' To Protect Sex Workers

The health and safety of sex workers: It's not an issue most of us tend to think about every day, but it's yet another example of how marginalized populations are often left out of essential public policy discussions on subjects like health care, housing, education, and workforce development.

That's why we thought it would be a good idea to jump on the phone with some leaders in the field of health and safety for sex workers to find out what philanthropy is doing, and what philanthropy could do, about this segment of our community.

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How Being An Oldest, Middle Or Youngest Child Shapes Your Personality

Only children have a reputation for being perfectionists and high-achievers, constantly seeking attention and approval from their parents and from others.

But children with siblings, too, express unique personality types based on their birth order.

While a number of factors play a role in a child's development -- including genetics, environment and parenting -- birth order can also influence their defining traits and behaviors.

Since the 1970s, thousands of scientific studies on birth order have been conducted, but psychologists often disagree about how much of a role birth order actually plays in development. However, some common aspects of the personalities of oldest, middle and youngest children that are consistent across the literature.

Why do these differences occur? Many psychologists have suggested that siblings' personalities differ insofar as they adopt different strategies to win their parents' attention and favor. By this theory, the oldest child may be more likely to identify with authority and support the status quo, while younger children are more likely to seek attention by rebelling.

"Kids learn their role in their family," Dr. Kevin Leman, a psychologist and the author of The Birth Order Book and The First-Born Advantage, told The Huffington Post. "Firstborns are held to a higher standard. As kids come into the birth order, parents loosen up."

Here's more on what science says about the personalities of youngest, middle and oldest children:

Oldest Child

Firstborn children tend to be achievement-oriented, often performing well in school and thriving in leadership positions, according to Leman.

"Firstborns are the first of everything ... and they are the standard-bearers," Leman said, adding that most U.S. presidents have been firstborn or only children.

Indeed, there is a good deal of research to support this personality profile, including a 2012 paper reviewing more than 500 studies from the past 20 years. In the paper, psychologists from the University of Georgia showed that the firstborn child (or the one who has taken on the psychological role of the "eldest") is the most likely to hold leadership roles and to strive for achievement. A 2009 study published in the journal Child Development also found that firstborn children are more likely to conform -- which can manifest as seeking to please their parents and others by doing well in school or in work.

"Firstborns tend to be responsible, competitive and conventional, whereas laterborns have to 'distinguish' themselves and create a specific niche by being playful, cooperative, and especially, rebellious," Belgian psychologists Vassilis Saroglou and Laure Fiasse wrote in a 2003 paper published in the journal Personality and Individual Differences.

Youngest Child

The personalities of youngest children -- including the newest member of the British royal family, Her Royal Highness Princess Charlotte of Cambridge -- are distinctly different from the personalities of their older siblings.

Studies have shown that the baby of the family tends to be more creative, rebellious and attention-seeking. This makes sense, considering the way parenting can often change from the oldest to the youngest child. Mom and dad are often more hands-off and lenient once they've become more comfortable in their role as parents, and have gone through the process of raising a child at least once.

"Youngest children are manipulative, social, outgoing, great at sales. ... They got away with murder as kids and know how to get around people," Leman said.

While the baby may be prone to attention-seeking behaviors, one study noted that there does not appear to be a link between youngest children and delinquency or problem behavior, as is sometimes suggested.

Middle Child

The oldest child gets Mom and Dad's undivided attention, while the baby of the family can often get away with doing whatever they want. So where does that leave the middle child?

The middle child tends to be the family peace-keeper, Leman noted, and often possesses traits like agreeableness and loyalty.

A 2010 review of birth order literature also found that it's common for middle children to be sociable, faithful in their relationships and good at relating to both older and younger people.

Because middle children are often stuck in the middle, quite literally, they tend to be great negotiators and compromisers, Leman said.

"Middle children are tougher to pin down, but they tend to be very loyal and to highly value their friendships," he added.

What Parents Can Do

So how can parents help oldest, middle and youngest children thrive? A parent's most important job is to support a child's unique journey, according to child development expert Dr. Gail Gross.

"Children need to be allowed to find their destiny, whatever their role in the family may be," Gross advises parents in a HuffPost blog.

Leman advised honoring each child's unique differences and respecting their diverse strengths and challenges.

"Treat your kids differently," he said.

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Carla Gugino Is Glad To See Young Actresses Finally Getting 'Roles That Really Count'

Actress Carla Gugino told HuffPost Live on Monday that there have been some real changes in Hollywood since the beginning of her career. While many actresses have spoken out about the lack of roles for women over 40, 43-year-old Gugino said that in the past, options for younger actresses were just as limited.

When I was 25, all I wanted to do was be the age I am now because there were no really meaty great roles for young women. And now, you know, you have Jennifer Lawrence. You have Shailene Woodley. Brit Marling is so wonderful. You have really wonderful actresses who are young women coming into their own who are getting to have roles that really count and they're really filling that space.


As she told host Nancy Redd, Gugino has seen a lot of progress in the stories that women are telling on the big screen.

"We're in a space where women from an early age people are realizing there's a big story to tell there and there are a lot of people who want to see it," she said.

Watch the full HuffPost Live conversation with Carla Gugino here.

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Melissa Rivers On #AskHerMore: ‘No One Wants To Discuss Massive Policies On The Red Carpet'

Melissa Rivers doesn't find celebrity interviewers' proclivity to ask about red carpet fashions to be an offensive practice, she explained in a HuffPost Live interview on Wednesday.

"This whole thing 'Ask Me More' -- I get it, but let's keep it in perspective," she told host Caitlyn Becker, referring to #AskHerMore, a Twitter campaign started around the 2014 Emmys in hopes of increasing the volume of non-sartorial questions directed toward female celebs.

The "Fashion Police" executive producer and The Book of Joan: Tales of Mirth, Mischief and Manipulation author elaborated:

So you're getting $30-40,000 dresses for free. You're supposed to say the designer's name. But, if you want to go out and buy your dress, and not have to worry about anyone asking you about it, and not having to promote anyone, fine! Let's talk about something else! ... But no one really wants to discuss massive policies on the red carpet ... And you say, ask me about more than just my dress, okay: Did you pay for it?


It's not that Rivers is opposed to starlets talking about topics other than fashion on the red carpet; rather, she wants to avoid conversation about style developing a stigma.

"If there's something interesting going on or you want to get out a message -- absolutely," she said. "But let's not carry it so far that it's an insult to ask who you're wearing."

Watch more from Melissa Rivers' conversation with HuffPost Live.

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